Reasons I Can’t Sit My Ass Down

I’ont know if marriage is my high calling. I’m just going to be honest with myself. The mere thought makes me shudder. I look around at my friends that are married with kids and can’t think of a single thing I want to do less. But I’d like to chill out… maybe be in a relationship (Read: Have more regular secks, since I don’t have any cut friends anymore *sigh*). Here’s the shit that trips me up in dating:

  1. I’m a guy on the inside. No, no. I’m not the trash ass Steve Harvey’s “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man,” girl/guy. My NATURAL instincts operate like a dude. Ego and all. Most of the guys I have dated confirm this, as do my friends. I CAN be “pink” and girly, but THAT’S what requires effort. I’m a mess.
  2. Making someone else my priority. Like. I want to do better with this. And I try sometimes. But when I’m living the slash/slash life, I can’t drop everything I’M doing to make a guy feel important.
    1. a- spontaneity is no longer a thing for me, unless I’m really interested. I have shit to do.
  3. I like to juggle *snickers.* What can I say?!?! I like variety. I usually end up dating a couple different guys for their strong suits. And when the negatives pop up, I just go to the next one until the previous one has a chance to chill. Ultimately make my dream guy out of any number of suitors (which also leads me to question monogamy… another post for another day)
  4. I’m super free spirited [Read: commitment-phobic]. That often means moving or traveling. A relationship [usually] requires some form of settling down and committing to a place and person. I’m not about that life.
  5. I’m “meh” on kids. I think most people settle down because they want children. With that off that table, what’s the rush?!?!

Everyone told me I’d change my mind when I was older. 28 they said. I’m 30. Whatever switch that makes most women want to sit down… I must aint get one. I’m going to have to find another wild thing and we can run off and be wild together.

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